Uncategorized

My Personal Nemesis

Every one of us have our personal nemesis. All of us. Nobody can really be unbeatable. Even Achilles had a weak spot. His ankle! Okay? Every one thought he was unbeatable. Nobody thought he would die. Nobody ever thought that he would get killed by Paris, the asshole prince who didn’t know anything and caused the downfall of the great Troy. Most probably the arrow Paris shot hit Achilles by fluke. There was no way he could have know about his only vulnerable spot. Anyway… my point is that every one has a week spot.

I have one. And the only reason I am admitting this is because this is an anonymous blog. And hopefully nobody will realize who the fuck I am. Well my most vulnerable spot is sports.

If you look at me you would think I would be really good. And I am. I mean I am not Hussein Bolt great but I am pretty good. But I wont do it. I was scarred by too many hurtful comments. 

It all started when my parents moved me from my sleepy, comfortable town in Kerela to the big, bad capital of India, Delhi. There though the kids were nice deep inside they covered it up by being mean, slightly cruel and very aggressive. I almost died. Those were the worst four years of my life. I was up till my neck in depression before we moved again. I didn’t know the language and screwed up my ass with anything to do with sports. I was teased for that. A LOT. What with the teasing and the feeling that I would never be good at anything my self esteem wasn’t worth cow shit. There is not a day I don’t thank my life that I moved from there. Though Delhi did teach me how to handle almost anything and everything.

However I still have a problem when ever I try to play sports. I hate it. I get scared. Scared? What am I saying. I get terrified. I hate it. But this year after a lot of debating with myself I decided it’s time to face my fears. And as I was an idiot I signed up for the next sports meet. I signed up for 200m and 400m. I just hope that i don’t die of embarrassment. 

Whatever happens I sure as hell hope that I wont start cutting myself again.

Feeling depressed,

Loozerina

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